When we published Part 1 of this series, something happened that reminded us exactly why this community exists. Women who had just been diagnosed started landing on that post in real time — days before their first appointment, hours before their haircut, looking for a sign that they could get through this. And the stories you shared with them were that sign.
So we kept collecting.
Hair loss during chemotherapy is still one of the most emotionally complex parts of a cancer diagnosis — and cutting your hair before chemo remains one of the most personal decisions you will make on this journey. There is still no single right answer. But there are as many brave, beautiful versions of this story as there are women living them. If you are asking yourself "When should I cut my hair before chemo?" or "Will I feel like myself again after hair loss?" or "How do I prepare emotionally for chemotherapy hair loss?" — this series is for you. Keep reading.
"Shortly after I started chemo to no surprise I started losing my hair. I'll never forget the day when it started falling out in chunks. It honestly felt like a sunburn that started to peel. I began to obsess with pulling it out. Each time I pulled, more hair would come out. After a few days my friend reached out and asked if I wanted a transition hair cut. I told her no and that I was ready to shave it. When she arrived at my house to shave it, I changed my mind. I wasn't ready to let it all go. We cut my hair into a super cute short bob. It was so cute and I was super glad I did that.
My husband and I had a night away from our toddler the night I cut my hair. When we got home, it was falling out so fast - I knew it was time. Honestly deciding when it was time to shave it was so hard. For some reason I didn't want to shave it too soon. I guess maybe I felt like I needed proof that it was time to others, sounds silly huh?
Soon after we got home my husband got the clippers. When he started shaving I jumped on Instagram Live, as I started seeing the comments rolling in I lost it and I cried so hard, let's just say the Instagram Live video didn't last too long before I turned it off.
It was such an emotional experience. So much of my personal identity was in my hair, sounds silly until you have lost it yourself.
I thought I would wake up every day sad about my hair but I didn't. Shaving it was so hard, but I never looked back. I have actually enjoyed having no hair and what a better time that COVID, no one is even leaving the house anyways.
And honestly I've learned to embrace it - my time getting ready has cut in half and I no longer have to worry about what my hair looks like!"
- Julia Erman, Special Needs Mom, Wife, Cancer Survivor and Coach
"I had been growing my hair out from a long bob for 2 years. When I found out I would be needing chemo, I scheduled an appointment with a stylist to cut into a cute pixie cut beforehand. My hair was midway down my back. Now it is very Tinkerbell. Once it begins to heavily shed due to the chemo, we will shave it at home with the clippers that we have for my husband."
"Oh wow...I had a journey! After my first chemo session, my scalp broke out in a rash and my hair HURT. It was painful to touch, sleep on, put up in a ponytail, and do other everyday things. I was SO attached to my hair (I had really great hair!) but the pain was too much.
I scheduled an appointment at a new salon and told the hairdresser I wanted a cute pixie cut. An hour later, I came out of the salon with a matching haircut as my mother. I was mortified at how bad it looked. The next day, I made my mom go to Target and buy a set of clippers. She and I sat at the kitchen table and shaved off the rest of my hair. There were no tears. We laughed a lot. We talked about how surreal it was. I rocked the buzzcut for about 48 hours before all my hair started falling out."
- Rachel Peterson, Advocate for Flat and Fabulous!
"Before losing my hair, I went to my hair salon and chopped it. I went from having blonde hair far below my shoulders to a longer pixie cut. I then took a trip to a shop supporting breast cancer patients to look for a wig. Instead of going wild, I went pretty simple and natural to what my longer style was before cutting it. There are many times after the fact where I wish I had tried something completely different. I think I was so nervous about not feeling and looking like myself.
Honestly though I didn’t really wear my wig that often. I mostly wore scarfs and hats. This is what I felt most comfortable in. A few days before the chemo session I was told would most likely take my hair out, I went to the same shop and had my hair buzzed. It was a very emotional moment for me. I pretty much cried the entire time I sat in the chair. At the time, it was really hard for me to look at myself in the mirror. Again looking back though I wish I would have rocked the buzz more during treatment. As my hair started coming back, I became more comfortable wearing the bald look and peach fuzz."
- Lauren Lopriore, Survivor & Founder of Live and Let
Final Words
What strikes us every time we read these stories is how different the paths are — and how much the same the feeling is underneath all of them. The fear before. The unexpected lightness after. The moment a woman looks in the mirror at her bare scalp and realizes she is still completely, unmistakably herself.
Chemotherapy hair loss does not have a timeline or a playbook. It does not care about the length of your hair or how attached you were to it. What it gives you, if you let it, is a chance to find out what you are made of — and to discover that it is more than you thought.
If your hair is coming out in clumps, or you are sitting with a diagnosis and trying to decide when to make the appointment, or you just want to know that someone else has been exactly where you are: we hope you found what you were looking for here.
Your hair journey is yours. Own every chapter of it.
Read Part 1 of Cutting Your Hair Before Chemo →
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